We’ve been talking about loopholes that people use to get around the spirit of laws. My favorite is Constantine the Great, the first Christian Roman emperor and a saint in the Eastern Orthodox, Oriental Orthodox, Byzantine Catholic, Anglican, and Lutheran churches.

Constantine didn’t get baptized until he was dying because baptism wiped away all one’s previous sins. He was a violent man…for instance he had one of sons killed with a slow poison and left his wife to die in an overheated bathtub…and he worried about going to hell. He wasn’t about to change his lifestyle so he waited until it was clear he could sin no more. He did manage to get the timing right. I don’t know if he made it to heaven, but he was awarded those sainthoods.

It also reminds me of some appeals from charities I’ve recently received. They weren’t asking for money now. They simply want me to remember them in my will. Oh, oh.

They remind me of buzzards circling overhead.

Have you ever received an appeal like that? If you did, how would you feel?

I don’t know about other countries, but here in the U.S. states allow people to buy “vanity plates”. Instead of a combination of letters/numbers issued by the state the buyer can choose his own…as long as it uses only about 6 or 7 letters or numbers, isn’t obscene, and hasn’t been already chosen.

msmail. Creative Commons license.

msmail. Creative Commons license.

Obviously people sometimes have to be ingenious to fit the restrictions, e.g., having to leave out letters while still conveying the meaning:

Tobyotter. Creative Commons license

 
One clever person took advantage of a special Virginia plate ($25 a year extra, plus $10 a year more for your choice of lettering) which allowed the buyer to support the state program against domestic violence.

His choice poked fun at the license plate, probably not quite what Virginia had in mind:

coolmallu. Creative Commons license.

 
Given the ingenuity of the human race and the law of unintended consequences, I wonder about an idea California is exploring. The state is looking into digital license plates. The license plate number would be displayed when the car is moving, but when it stopped for a stop sign, red light, or because of traffic gridlock, a miniature billboard would appear. The scheme would make more money for the up-to-its-ears-in-debt state and allow the buyers more creative flexibility. But I wonder how they would regulate the results. What do you think? Given the creativity and perversity of some human beings, do you think the scheme is a good idea or more trouble than it would be worth?

This cartoon reminds me of Looney saying the Chinese have a rich vocabulary for different kinds of smiles. I wonder what they would call Earl’s in the cartoon above. Or what they would call the father’s smile in this cartoon:

Are you as much of a sucker for a genuine smile as I am? How would you react to the smiles in these two cartoons? I would think Earl’s was coerced… and the father’s smile seems too intrusive. Even if the father isn’t faking his cheerfulness, trying to talk his son into feeling the same way has to be annoying. Have you ever been in a situation like that? Either as the cheerful person or the person being annoyed? Do you agree with the Chinese that there are many kinds of smiles?

Some kind of help is the kind of help that helping’s all about. Some kind of help is the kind of help we can all do without.

Clearly Earl’s is the kind we can all do without, unlike Arlo’s in the following cartoon (click on cartoon for larger version):

What about you? Have you ever had memorable help from someone? What kind was it?

Many people use chocolate to lift their spirits, but according to a recent article about chocolate and depression this hasn’t been scientifically proven yet. That came as a surprise to me, I had assumed that was true. I’m also surprised by another statement in the article….research has shown that people who eat at least one chocolate bar a week are more apt to be depressed than people who eat chocolate less often.

selva. Creative Commons license.

 
Do you believe this? If so do you think they’re eating chocolate to self-medicate? Or maybe chocolate gives temporary relief with rebound effects. I still remember my husband getting a headache every afternoon and for some reason a Sunkist orange soda relieved it. This went on for month and months until we read an article that Sunkist had caffeine in it. Ah! Who would have guessed? So once he stopped the soda the caffeine headaches went away after a few days.

Anyway, what do you think about chocolate? Scientists have decided more research needs to be done. I personally think it’s a fun topic.

Goldman Sachs, an investment bank, is being questioned by the U.S. Senate for some of its unethical practices…the firm sold products that it itself was betting against. Numerous internal e-mails talked about how bad the products were. When a Congressman read one of the e-mails and asked the Chief Financial Officer if he thought Goldman Sachs should have been selling the products the CFO answered, “I think that’s a very unfortunate thing to have on an e-mail.” People in the hearing room burst out laughing. Sometimes it helps to laugh.

The Securities and Exchange Commission has filed a civil suit for investment fraud against the company, but it isn’t clear that they can prove any law was broken. So Andy Borowitz had fun with the situation in his April 25th report. He claims eleven indicted Somali pirates are claiming their operations have been legal because they weren’t pirates. Instead they are investment bankers. They allegedly became a subsidiary of Goldman Sachs in 2008 and had simply attacked ships that Goldman Sachs had bet against. They merged their operations with the banking giant in order to get their fair share of the government bailout money and also because the laws against investment bankers are much more lenient than the laws against pirates. Borowitz quoted one government source who said, “There are lots of laws that could bring these guys down if they were, in fact, pirates. But if they’re bankers, our hands are tied.”

What about you? Is this something you can laugh about?

This past winter Mattel Inc., decided to let their customers choose what Barbie’s next career will be. Anyone who visited the Barbie.com website could vote for architect, anchorwoman, computer engineer, environmentalist or surgeon. More than 600,000 votes were received and computer engineer was the top pick.

The interesting thing is it wasn’t young girls who voted for her…they chose anchorwoman. But the voting was open to anyone. No one could vote more than once, but adults were not excluded. And some female computer engineers who learned about the election launched an internet campaign for Barbie as a computer engineer. Mattel was happy to oblige. Computer-engineer Barbie will come out this coming winter and Mattel hope she “inspires a new generation of girls to explore this important high-tech industry, which continues to grow and need future female leaders.”

I applaud them. I also applaud them for also deciding to honor the youngsters who voted by also producing an Anchorwoman Barbie. The world is big enough for both.

What do you think?

Do you enjoy dispensing your hard-earned wisdom to younger people? Or are you more like Earl in this cartoon?

 
When my daughter was about to leave home my husband told her, “Free advice is worth what you pay for it.” He explained that we older folks love to give advice, don’t let it bother her. Just humor us by listening, thank us politely, then go off and do whatever she had been planning to do.

That’s one piece of unsolicited advice she took. At a family reunion one summer her aunts were dispensing their wisdom to her, pleased that they could be sharing their worldly experience with the younger generation. My daughter listened politely and let them enjoy their moment of satisfaction. Then she told them what her father had taught her. They had the good grace to burst out laughing and never again gave her unasked-for advice.

What about you? What’s your opinion about unsolicited advice?

Do you believe in fate? Do you think Earl (the fellow in the cartoon) is carrying the idea just a bit too far?